Last night, Jim and I celebrated the completion of all our adoption training classes. 36 hours! Woo hoo! It was an adult adoptee panel, and it was interesting to hear the stories of these two individuals who went from unwanted orphans to highly successful adults. (It was also a little sad and daunting to hear the stories of their adopted siblings who went down less successful roads...Same parents, different outcomes...I pray that we have the wisdom to meet each of our childrens' needs differently and effectively!)
As we picked up our final certificates, Jim conferred with our social worker (who hosted the class) about our last 3 interviews this month, and asked about what the timeline for an actual child placement might look like. We know that it all depends on the situation, and could be immediate or several years, but I guess Jim just wanted a hopeful answer.
Hope is not what we got.
Her trite response was "Oh, that could be another year and a half." We wandered back to the car, and reality hit us like a dump truck. The elation of being "done" deflated into the understanding that the waiting game is really just starting.
But we're tired of waiting. We want a child of our own so much it hurts. Last weekend, Jim's sister's baby came for a visit (ok, so Matt and Becky came, too), and Jim just couldn't wait to get home to play with her. At church, he wanted to be the one to pick her up from the nursery, and then he carried her around on a tour of the church showing her off to anyone he saw...I'm going through that phase again where just the sight of a pregnant woman or a baby in the store gets me all teary...We can't wait!...But it looks like we have to...Urgh!
As we drove back home, we sighed and reassured ourselves that God has a plan, and however long it takes, it's going to be perfect. Maybe He'll surprise all of us with an immediate match. Maybe He'll wait until we're done with all our writing and movie-making dreams. (I hope not, because I'm not sure if Jim will ever be done with those!) Maybe (dare I think this aloud?) He's going to let me get pregnant afterall, and then match us with a child so we get the twins I've dreamed about...
Whatever that "maybe" entails, we can't keep living for the future. We have to live in today. We have a novel sequel to finish. We have another movie script we're moving forward on. We have teenagers who need us. We have a missions trip coming up in five days. We're going to Haiti this summer!
So, onward we go. Any of you praying for our adoption process, please pray that God will continue to grant us peace and patience, and that He'll be preparing us to meet the needs of whatever child(ren) He gives us in His perfect timing. Thanks!
Ugh, my heart breaks for you guys. I know how long you've been waiting, voluntarily and non, and I wish you could get what you planned for. You guys have so much going on, it blows my mind. It's so hard to wait for His timing even though we know it's perfect. Any time you want my kids I'll happily ship them over ;)
ReplyDeleteHi Rachel, I was just checking in with your blog. I will keep you and Jim in my prayers and I'm so happy for you guys that you get to go to Haiti!!
ReplyDeleteKelley (Sorrels) Gecik