So, I just got home from my doctor's appointment--my final attempt to get a second (actually fourth) opinion on our "unexplained" infertility. So that insurance would cover the visit, I did it under the guise of seeking help for another annoying-but-not-serious symptom I've been having that falls in the spectrum of non-fertility-related women's issues (but which I believe could be contributing to not getting pregnant even though three other doctors have said it's nothing to worry about). Well, FINALLY somebody has an explanation that may make sense! Woo hoo! If only the treatment options were as simple...
Since I realize that mixed company may read this, I'll keep the details to a minimum, but here is my new dilemma:
This wonderful new doctor took my descriptions of my symptoms along with what the other doctors tried and said and...she guesses that I may have one of two possible problems:
1--I may have something like polyps in my uterus.
2--I may have a form of endometriosis. This second one shocked me, since I have none of the normal symptoms associated with it (i.e. cramping, discomfort, etc...), but she said she has found other patients with no symptoms at all, and my mild/annoying one is consistent with endometriosis.
And here is the fun part:
The way to identify for sure if either of these is the problem, as well as then the way to treat either of these, is to do a laparoscopy/hysteroscopy. This is a surgical procedure where I will be knocked out, my abodmen inflated, my internal organs moved around, several tools inserted through incisions around my belly button, and then if they find anything (i.e. polyps or endometrial tissue) they will burn and/or scrape them away.
Doesn't that sound lovely?!
So now I find myself in the valley of decision.
My initial reaction is no way! That sounds horrible! The brief research I just did online has not calmed my fears in any way. And it isn't cheap. While they'll have to check with my insurance if I decide to proceed to get the actual price, it looks like it can range from several hundred dollars to one or two thousand dollars! From the beginning of this journey, Jim and I have decided that there are plenty of kiddos out there already born who need a family, and we don't feel comfortable spending a lot of money just so we can have one of our "own".
If I don't do it, will I wonder for the rest of my life if this one procedure could have allowed me to experience pregnancy and childbirth--something I really do think I long for? Yep, for sure. Not to mention, that it should alleviate the "annoying" symptom I mentioned earlier.
We're so close to being done with the adoption process. I anticipate that we'll be ready to go by late April, and we're really hoping/praying that we'll be matched with a kid by the end of summer. So, if this procedure worked, that would be just around the time I might be able to get preggo. But I would really love to be able to enjoy my first baby and my first pregnancy one at a time. I'm pretty sure double duty would stress me out and I'd miss out on a lot of the memories I've looked forward to so long...So, should we postpone the adoption matching process? Or postpone the laparoscopy procedure? Or...?
And, this still might not do anything...So, then, is it worth it?
Urg! While I wage this internal debate, I'm going to go prune my roses and enjoy this glorious day God has given me. Working outside tends to calm my mind and give me clarity. Let's hope it works today!
And meanwhile I ask you, what would you do if you were in my shoes? Help!